Hagen Auras

Hagen Auras - PADI Instructor.

Some say he sleeps inside out and that he belongs to an ancient tribe of travelling "folk". Others that he can smell beer from a thousand ft. All we know is he's called....

The Carnie

Hagen's early life is shrouded in mystery but it is believed he used to sell Tea Cup rides to well heeled bratwurst scoffers in the Black Forest. After graduating from the University of Vienna with a Doctorate in Carny Business Development Hagen found himself in the Red Sea and has never looked back. Hagen is fluent in German, English and Navajo Indian. He is also the fastest speaking human in the Northern hemisphere.

Andrew Mackenzie

Andrew Mackenzie - SSAC Master Instructor, TDI instructor
and PADI MSDT.

Some say he is a direct descendant of William Wallace and that his blood is tartan. Others that he has better stain removing power than Oxi Clean. All we know is he's called.....

Andrew Mackenzie

Andrew is another island boy coming from a small lonely rock in the outer-outer Scottish highlands where the hit TV series Father Ted was filmed. The eldest of 19 children Andrew soon moved away from Craggy Island pursuing a career in modelling appearing on the cover of "Freedom" and "Haggis Weekly" magazines. After a holiday to the Red Sea Egypt in 1923, Andrew decided to stay inventing the "underwater breathy-ma-bob" 30 years before Cousteau devised his Aqualung. Andrew is fiercely Scottish and often wears a skirt. And make-up. Well!

Khaled Amrosy

Khaled Amrosy -PADI MSDT and wan-a-be Rasta

Some say mosquitoes turn to bats when they bite him. Others that he shaves with a shot gun and jelly makes him horny. All we know is he's called....

Grizzly

Originating from Easter Island Khaled's ancestors where responsible for the statues of the funny looking dudes on the beach. Upon graduating from Easter Island University with a bachelors degree in Stone Lip Sculpture Khaled left for the United States to pursue his dream of making it big on Broadway. Realising he couldn't sing or dance for shit he signed up for a course in Scuba Diving and moved to Egypt where he learned Mandarin and aromatherapy. His hobbies include collecting rabbit droppings, naked ice hockey and sewing.

Nick Stec

Nick Stec - PADI IDCS , Videographer and entry level gigolo.

Some say he is the result of a joint MI6/CIA human giraffe hybrid experiment from the 60's. Others that his blood type is PG +. All we know is he's called....

THE STEC.

Often found sat atop his beloved steed "tonto" at Anthias and Camel bar the Stec loves a good debate. His ability to see other points of view with good grace is legendary. He has also held the prestigious "Bristol Region Pedantic Spelling Meet" champion title 15 years on the trot. In his spare time the Stec pursues his other passion as a male gigolo and runs an unsuccessful male escort company called "Booty for Hire" filling a niche in the "desperate" market.

Matt Le Clercq

Matt Le Clercq - PADI MSDT, Videographer and free diver.

Some say he can make a set of keys disappear faster than Dived Copperfield. Others that in a previous life he was Isaac Newton. All we know is he's called....

THE FINS.

Fins was born in a pokey island in the North Atlantic and took to the water early in an attempt to escape. His affinity with diving became clear to his parents who had to treat him for DCS just moments after birth. His ability to sniff out and gate crash any party within 200 miles is legendary and can usually manage to attend any and all he finds. In his pare time Fins loves tackling complex issues such as the amount of dark matter in the universe and where the next round coming from.

Leonie Wilkinson

Leonie Wilkinson - PADI Rescue

Some say she invented bullet proof vests and pasta. Others that she has the 3rd largest collection of wombat paraphernalia in the world. All we know is she's called.......

Leo.

Another member hailing from the Cockney streets of London Village Leo spent her childhood running an illegal gambling den, an opium warehouse and a laundrette. After a joint investigation by MI5, Interpol, the FBI and KFC Leo was forced to flee London to lay low in Egypt. While there she discovered her passion for being under water and soon enrolled in an Open Water Course, taught by The Fins. After a week under Dr Adel's care in the Sharm Hyperbaric Chamber Leo fell for Fins and completed her AOW course. Her other interests are antique clock repair, wombat grooming and care for the mentally challenged. She can also drink like a fish.

Terry Nichols

Terry Nichols - PADI Master Instructor.

Some say that he chases tiger sharks with 30 BAR. Others that he does so while wearing fishnets.
all we know is that he's called

Dive Goo

Originally from the depths of Thomas Canyon, Little is known of his early years in mancland. We do know that a successful run on Star In Their Eyes (appearing as Chesney Hawks) landed him his first big break. Being in a band playing the drums was always a dream of his - but he quickly grew restless. Playing soft rock and drumming for Chris De Burgh just wouldn't cut it. And after failing in his bid to join Right Said Fred, he said "bollocks".
Moving to Cyprus changed his path though and he chose to pursue a career as a dive god, working with such individuals as Amy and Fatboy. Eventually ending up in Sharm, Terry spent his days teaching and guiding. His evenings were spent laughing at badgers and dancing in Lycra. Ranting at taxi drivers is his true passion though. This is quickly followed by hiding in hedges and mumbling about curry.
His interests include spanking off into the blue, speed archaeology and turning fins' air on. Fins is also a fan of all 3.

Bea Moreno

Bea Moreno - PADI OWSI and part time panda bear.

Some say she is terrified of pink things and her blood is toxic to snails. Others that she resonates violently when placed next to lettuce and that a map to the lost city of gold is tattooed under the skin of her feet. All we know is she's called....

The Bea.

Bea was originally found in the net of an Icelandic fishing trawler hunting for Atlantic Cod in 1998 after a deck hand called out he'd found a baby merwoman, a mythical creature with the head of a woman and the body of a woman. After 12 years as an exhibit in a travelling circus Bea escaped to the Island of Spain where she learned catering and ship building before heading to Tenerife to work as a waitress in a cocktail bar. However, diving is in her blood and she soon found herself lured back to her watery home. Although a diving instructor Bea doesn't actually need scuba and can survive indefinitely for up to 1 hour. She speaks Spanish, English, Mongolian, Tuna and Trevally and is only 3ft tall. But feisty.

Catherine Roberts

Catherine Roberts - PADI OWSI and all round good egg.

Some say she was raised by bush ninjas in the Kalahari desert. Others that she can absorb more than her own weight in alcohol and has a penchant for Brazilian folk music. All we know is she's called.....

The Cat.

Arriving in Sharm from outer space Cat started her rescue course and soon progressed to DM under the expert tutelage of the DiveGod. Before realising her great teaching ability beneath the water, however, Cat was bus conductor in Peckham, a door to door televangelist, a NASA flight attendant and the drummer from rock band Metallica. Her hobbies are inventing random drinking games, playing random drinking games and winning random drinking games. She also on the board of the Sharm Transvestite Association.

Jordi Casals Olmo

Jordi Casals Olmo - PADI OWSI and Womaniser

Some say meat-balls make him giddy and jelly makes him fart. Others that he was fed with a catapult as a child. All we know is he's called.....

JORDI.

Few people know where Jordi actually comes from. Although he speaks Spanish, Hungarian and Australian neither of these countries are willing to claim responsibility for him. After a turbulent time at Prince Umbongo's Regional School for Abnormal Children, where he was allegedly expelled for blowing up home economics class slightly wounding 3 girl guides and a gold fish, Jordi discovered diving and promptly moved to the Red Sea. Today, still on the run from the authorities in 13 European countries Jordi guides live-a-boards in the South for wealthy mad eccentric Spaniards with a death wish. He favourite TV show is Oprah. He dislikes toast intensely.

David Armstrong

David Armstrong - PADI MSDT - TDI Technical Diving Instructor.

Some say he was developed by the United States Navy at their Marine Mammal Research Centre in San Diego, California. Others that cannot digest fruit. All we know is he's called.....

Dinky Dave.

Dinky has a passion for travelling fast and landed his first speeding ticket at 4 years old whilst riding a pedal tricycle at 47mph through a branch of Boots the Chemist is Slough, earning him the nickname "Way-too-fast Dave". Other than diving Dink's other hobbies include cooking, ornithology and underwater basket weaving. He is also the Chiarman of the Sharm Butch Lesbian Society. Dinky is at his most happiest doing 12 knots at 150 metres on his Megalodon rebreather.

Al Westley

Al Westley - PADI MSDT and dive guide extraordinaire.

Some say that when he was born he was bright red with a number 7 on his back. Others that barracuda become sexually aroused around him. All we know is he's called....

Big Al.

From an early age (about 2) Al developed a passion for water after seeing his first Hooters wet T-shirt competition. Al started diving at the age of 4 by faking his way into a bubble maker program at the local swimming baths in his home town of Manchester. 14 years later Al did his IDC in the Manchester Ship Canal under 4 feet of ice wearing a 2mm shorty. After marrying his wife, Mrs Westley, the big fella moved out to Sharm where he can often be found in the Camel Bar with his favourite tipple - Stella. His hobbies include barn dancing, footballing and flower arranging.

Dominic van den Bergh

Dominic van den Bergh -PADI OWSI

Some say his webbed feet were a gift from the Duchess of Cornwall. Others that once a year bananas grow from his ears and squirrels spontaneously combust just thinking about him. All we know is he's called....

Dom.

Born a hermaphrodite Dom spent much of his youth living in the bushes of the Kruger National Park. Raised by baboons until he was 21 Dom left his tribe and moved to Siberia where he studied advanced advanced soup making techniques for beginners. After several happy years up to his eyeballs in carrots and leeks Dom felt it was time to move on and after a few months travelling throughout Guam he found himself in Egypt. Dom now works in Sharm's Na'ama Bay, pimping himself out to the highest bidder. At the weekends he enjoys making things out of blancmange and picking at ants nests with a stick.

Kevin Grice

Kevin Grice - PADI IDCS (he should be by now!?)

Some say his earlobes are softer than velvet and raccoons long to be near him. Others that he is illegal in certain parts of Korea. All we know is he's called......

The Fat Boy.

Kevin is quite simply a legend. No really. The Umpoopoo tribe of Botswana worship Kev as a Demi-God and have erected hippo faeces monuments resembling Buddha in his honour. When he was born Kev weighed 17lb 8-3/4oz. Even today, Kev is so fat his drivers license alone weighs over a pound. After graduating from Manchester University with a double doctorate in Footballering and Mob Combat Kev wound up in Cyprus and studied diving under Professor Gianrico Mureddu who also taught the Dive God. Kev has a passion for French Architecture and soft furnishings and his favourite colour is red.

Rebecca Westley

Rebecca Westley - PADI OWSI and Bar Manager

Some say she was the inspiration for Smurfette and Jessica Rabbit. Others that she is impossible to X-Ray and is allergic to tennis. All we know is she's called.....

Becky.

Originally born Asteria Anchimache to Princess Lampedo of the lost Amazon tribe of Hesychius, Becky graduated top of her class, Majoring in Excessive Force with a Stick and Leathal use of Words. However, shortly after her 16th birthday the tribe began to notice that Becky was some 3 - 4 ft shorter than the rest of the tribe and by the time she was 17 they had cast her out. Alone and angry, Becky vowed revenge on those who had forsaken her and moved to Japan where she studied Ninjitsu and met her husband, Mr Westley.
3 years later she stormed her old village in a Nissan Micra armed with twin 50 cal machine guns and grenade launchers. And so today she is the sole surviving member of the Hesychius Amazons. Her interests are dominoes, archery, sword fighting, bare foot fishing and embroidery. Do not mess with Becky.

Nick Browne

Nick Browne – Dive Manager and PADI technical snorkeler

Some say that he can outsmart Tiger Woods from his armchair and that he sleeps on a bed of guinea pig fur. Others that he secretly enjoys WWF and occasionally wears a wetsuit. 
All we know is that he's called . . .

MR.B

Born in Jamaica and raised in Bavaria, Mr.B spent most of his time in Madagascar where he taught ringed-tailed lemurs how to Riverdance. After some irish dude secretly filmed his classes and made a mint on Broadway - Mr.B returned to his roots and pursued a career in refrigeration architecture. This was not to last though. While working for Zanussi, the company was suddenly sold on ebay to a wombat recovery clinic in Nevada. 

His favourite artists are The Credence Clearwater Revival and The Wurzels. When the weather is bad he enjoys crazy paving whilst listening to "Gold" by Spandau Ballet. 

James Wilkinson

James Wilkinson - PADI IDCS, IT guru and beer monster.

Some say he is the most dangerous man in Sharm El Sheikh. Others that he is the most dangerous man in whatever part of the world he happens to be and that he is 98.99% Jagermeister. All we know is he's called.....

Jager Bear.

Hailing from the Cockney streets of London village Jager is no stranger to bars, booze n birds. After Majoring in Chemical Toxicology at The Cray's University in Chelsea, Jager found a new more lucrative career in IT & computers. To this day he is still on the FBI's 10 most wanted list and regularly writes articles for Modern Hacker Magazine. An avid wine and drinks buff, Jager is famous for his blinding "Venom Vodka" and insanity inducing "Turbomeister" cocktails. He also likes diving. And strange women.

Amy Elizabeth Oxtoby

Amy Elizabeth Oxtoby - PADI MSDT and Shark magnet

Some say that she can talk to whale sharks and dance with oceanic’s. Others that she can fix a Jeep with a toothpick and a stare. All we know is that she's called. . .

THE AIMS.

While spending her childhood training as a soux chef and learning the lethal art of razor blade cake decoration - she also studied the fine arts of argument killing and doing so graciously. 
There is not much to say on this particular fish. What we know is under investigation. What we don't know should never be investigated. The only piece of information we can reveal - is the fact that we can't reveal what we know. She talks with tigers FFS. 

Her interests include identifying new species of transparent nudibranch in zero visibility, subtly berating muppets in scuba and picking up terry's guests when he's spanking it in the blue. 
Do not mess with Amy. Even Amy doesn't. 

Sean Farrell

Sean Farrell - PADI Advanced Open Water & Discotech Jockey.

Some say he drinks through his feet and that birds suddenly appear every time he is near. Others that he once sang none stop from New York to Paris to raise money for orphaned tadpoles. All we know is he's called.....

DJ Sean Farrell

Invented in London in 1978 as a replacement for an ageing pair of Technics SL1210Mk2's at the Frog 'n' Ferret in Tooting Beck Sean's early years were spent blasting out classic's from Phil Collins, Bananarama and the Thomson Twins. The inventor of the pickle and a keen Organic Thespian he once starred along side Nicolae Herlea in Gioacchino Rossini's The Barber of Seville playing the mute village idiot in scene 4 act 2. After a spell in the Egyptian version of CATS (called Stray CATS) and Starlight Express (called Sharm Lights Depress) he returned to his beloved London smog. Nowadays, however, Sean prefers the quiet life and can often be found unconscious and drooling on Clapham Common in the early hours. His hobbies include but are not limited to : Clay Dear Shooting, Exotic Tea Mixing and Bovine Taxidermy.

Pete Bruce

Pete Bruce - PADI MSDT

Some say he's so tall the FAA insist he wears a flashing light on his head when in the USA. Others that crickets become violently sexually aroused around him and that he only eats fried aardvark. All we know is he's called.....

Pete the Bruce.

Born somewhere between Reykjavik and Detroit the Bruce went to the Vicky Pollard School of Acting and graduated with Honours in Nocturnal Potato Picking. To make extra cash he worked as a part time mobile crane for a local branch of Jewson, handing lunch boxes and fizzy sweets to workers up scaffolding. Happy in his career until an tragic belly dancing accident in 2003 leaving him partially deaf in one eye and a bus load of school kids mentally scarred for life the Bruce left his home town of Biggleswade to seek his fortune. It turned out to be a blessing in disguise as Pete found he had a unnatural ability to attract squid and was soon in great demand in Hong Kong's fish markets. 8 years later he now works in Egypt as a diving instructor teaching and guiding for special needs. Pete loves dressing as a fairy, hungry hungry hippos and fizzy sweets.

Corri Clarke

Corri Clarke - PADI IDCS, Dive Centre Asst Manager.

Some say she has the largest collection of Staples catalogues in the world. Others that she once chewed the head off a Bengal tiger who accidentally wondered into her office one morning and that she has a nuclear powered liver. All we know is she's called.....

Corri.

Legend has it that Corri is a direct descendant of Cleopatra and Marc Anthony, her family tree dating back to the Devonian. Originally born on Pitcairn Island sometime during the 60's her early life is sketchy but it is believed that she set up the islands first (and only) stationary shop at the age of 4. By the time she was 8 she was accepted into London's famous Italia Conti Academy of Arts where she studied 80's guitar legends and Bonnet Dramas. After leaving Britain she toured Peru, China, Tibet, Venezuela and Grimsby teaching kids about bonnets, frocks and long winded drivel she came to Egypt where her passion for newts, fish and teaching led her to diving. Today she can be found behind the glass at Oonas Dive Club handing out crew lists, compasses and scathing remarks. Corri loves paper clips, pencils, ring binders and those clear sleeves you put in folders. She also enjoys bonnet dramas. A lot.

Ben Hawkes

Ben Hawkes - PADI IDCS

Some say that he can whip up a gerbil casserole with his eyes closed. Others that he once streaked through a rehearsal for the London Philharmonic orchestra. All we know is that he's called . . .

BEN

Originally from Dartmouth where he roamed the moors and stroked the ferns, Ben’s adoration of the marine world started young when he could often be found playing tidily winks with tadpoles. After being arrested for foliage violation and released on bail, he skipped the country and chose to hide out in Tenerife, spending his time learning the trombone and making bongos from perfectly good mangos. As a result of the great mango famine of '72 he moved to Egypt where he spent his time guiding sharks bay house reef. To this day he still loves that house reef. So much so that he never bothered with the rest of Ras mo. Oh how he loves sharks bay. Even more so than foliage violation.

ANTI FINS

ANTI FINS:

Some say that he can recite Pi to 2012 decimal places. Others that he will be eating pie in 2012. All we know is that he's called . . .

WHERES FINS GONE?

Emerging from the Atlantic wearing a tailor made suit and carrying a wombat - he arrived on a pokey island - and after finding a Mercedes full of cash he promptly lost the keys. His early days were spent being 10 seconds ahead of his counterpart and making locksmiths rich. Although very rarely making an appearance, people are astounded by his logic and compassion when he does. Having the diving ability of a sperm whale and the forethought to turn his air on - anti fins is a formidable diver. 

He has a wonderful rapport with taxi drivers, loves jogging and takes particular delight in the working of the known universe. He dislikes Fins to the point that they are never seen together. Fins thinks he's a knob.